Aug 28, 2021
Normalcy throughout chemotherapy…is that even possible? I don’t know, but I’m gonna try as best I can to have some sense of my old life. I’m not one to publicize when I’m sick, or when my family is going through hard times. I was taught to just suck it up and handle your business. I kind of become a hermit when I’m sick and need to deal with just getting better on my own terms. That is not to say that I don’t let people in when needed. I did tell those I speak to daily because as mentioned, I needed to vent. I was going through some scary times and having my friends in my corner really helped so much. Not broadcasting my illness was best for me.
I’ve had no real experience with cancer treatment aside from watching my dad fight pancreatic cancer, but pancan is it’s own hell; by the time we become aware of it in the body, it’s really too late. I had no real experience with anyone who had breast cancer either. I didn’t realize there were so many different types of breast cancers or various drugs to deal with each type. I mentioned earlier that I chose not to do any research on my diagnosis either which is extremely unusual for me. I’m hard-pressed to take vitamins and have always tried to do right by my body with good foods, exercise, and trying natural more homeopathic solutions when I got sick. Cancer is just way out of my league. It was too much. The information coming in from the medical staff at MD Anderson was inundating me along with my emotions and anxiety. I just let go. I decided they knew what was best and it’s true. I would learn from my local oncologist that there is a specific regimen to treat what I have and that was that so I’m just taking a step forward each day doing what needs to be done to get through this treatment with high spirits, or whatever possible on any given day, determined to be the anomaly to the side effects.
My biggest concern when I first found out about having invasive ductal carcinoma, HER2+, was knowing I would have to go through chemo and lose my hair. That was my biggest concern at the time (I’ve since learned of other shittier worse things). It was then I learned about cold capping. Cold capping is a process of freezing the hair follicles with a gel cap before, during and after chemo infusions in an attempt to save your hair from falling out. There are some systems that run automatically with a hose attached to a machine that continuously cycle cold air or water through the cap, and some that are manual which mean you have to change the caps yourself very frequently throughout the day. My oncologist had literally just purchased one of the automatic machines but it wasn’t up and running by the time of my first treatment, so I had to move forward with a manual system. I decided to go with the popular Penguin Cold Caps.
I didn’t want to lose my hair. I’m not only vain, I didn’t want to feel like I was sick. Everyone knows when you look shitty, you feel shitty and it translates into a shitty mood for yourself. It’s hard to keep your spirit up when you’re down on yourself. But also, wouldn’t it be cool if I could move forward in life without anyone realizing I was sick? Gimmie that cold cap. I needed a “capper” so that would be my husband. It’s a LONG ASS DAY of therapy. The first session was 6 hours of infusion. The second was much shorter at 4 hours. Then you have to come home and cap for another 4 hours afterward. By the way, the caps need to be changed every 25 minutes because the temperature needs to be -32° Celsius (-25 Fahrenheit). My entire scalp has to be frozen for about 8-10 hours on chemo day.
I did join a chemo cold capping group to get some tips from other ladies who have gone through this experience. I’m not good at being in total ignorance. I purchased and packed up all the goodies I needed including the following:
special hair shampoo, detangler, wide-tooth comb, moisturizing facial products, ear muffs, and moleskin for my forehead to protect against frostbite, a blanket, booties, and hand gloves to ice my hands and feet to fight neuropathy, mouthwash to fight mouth sores, anti-nausea cough drops, and prescriptions, protein nail polish to help keep my fingernails, electric blanket to stay warm, and found a dry ice supplier.
By the way, hopefully, all of this will be covered later by my health insurance. Just the cold cap rental alone is $2000.
Dry ice suppliers provide ice at a special rate for chemotherapy patients. I was able to find a supplier here in Dallas at .30 cents a pound. Dry ice is currently selling at $2 a pound. You need about 50-60 pounds of dry ice each time. It’s not cheap to be sick here in America and sad for the unfortunate without health insurance. I’m lucky to have insurance especially because just 1 year ago we had NO health insurance. So I suppose it is God’s timing that I found my lump when I did or we probably would have gone bankrupt.
Anyway, the caps are placed in dry ice about an hour before we leave for chemo. I start my first cap an hour before the first chemo drug, Taxotere, during the premeds of steroids, anti-nausea, and Benadryl. Caps are changed every 25 minutes after that for the next 8 hours. It’s a LONG ASS DAY for my capper, but I’m grateful for the effort to save my hair.
So, if you’re going to cold cap, you can’t wash your hair but once a week. Can’t comb it. Can’t style it with hair dryers or hot irons. The less you touch it the better. The shampoos you use have to be as natural as can be with no parabens sulfites sulfates blah blah blah. You have to wash and rinse with cold water. I also decided not to use Plano water because it’s too chemically treated. By that I mean, there are periods of time you can smell the chlorine, and or the chlorine burns your eyes/skin. So I buy filtered watered and that is what I wash and rinse my hair with and it’s sooooo cold! I cut my hair pretty short to keep it maintenance-free and because it seemed that women with shorter thin hair seemed to have more luck keeping their hair. It really seems like luck of the draw, honestly. The chemo drug I am on does have a low risk of permanent alopecia, so even if I lose my hair, I am doing myself a favor. Additionally, using the cold caps and freezing your scalp does in fact help your hair return at a much faster rate than not capping at all. Some women notice regrowth beginning as soon as a few weeks, without it, it can take several months.
I am currently 24 days out from my first cycle and have not shed any hair yet. I am keeping my fingers crossed to continue this trend. We’ll see what happens! Keeping positive and enjoying my hair every day I have it!! And who knew?! I have been trying to figure out the best method to enjoy the natural curls, but it took me getting breast cancer to finally rock my curly hair! Hahahaha! The little things still bring me joy.😏
